Goals set me up for success, but it’s more likely they will actually end in failure. For every ten of my goals I only fully meet one. So, why do I keep making goals? Well, it’s simple. With every journey to meet a goal -failure or success- I learn and I grow. I may feel like I am making it nowhere, but when I look back I can see I have made it much farther than I imagined. In order to cultivate growth there are a few points to meet. One, I must choose goals that fit my ability. Two, goals are not just for the grand things, I must remember to make small but important goals as well. Three, I need to be steadfast and never quit trying again and again.

When deciding a goal, I need to judge my own ability and match it with an appropriate outcome. I can not decide to become a WNBA star and then try and push myself towards such an unrealistic dream because I am not in well enough health or in a place in my life for a WNBA career -not too mention the skill required. That “dream” must then remain only a dream. However I could decide that I’d like to go to the gym once a week and shoot some hoops. Then I could make a plan, acquire the necessary tools, and then work on building up my motivation to ensue manifestation of my goal. I could write down the pros I would receive from my efforts or learn some new techniques to aid me. Use anything I can to build up the hype in my mind -and heart- for the prioritized goal.

Sure, I want to make grand goals and then enjoy my success if and when that may happen, but I have found if I shift my focus to the seemly meeker ones then I have a higher rate of success. For instance I want to loose weight -isn’t that everyone’s goal? Instead of starving myself and rushing weak results, I could instead start with minor adjustments to my diet and a daily walk -no, not a five mile walk, but a nice stroll. Then once I have become accustomed to those changes I can build on that foundation slowly and eventually I will turn out sturdier results, along with a healthier lifestyle. Time produces the best product, I must only be perseverant.

Never give up!!! Let me explain: I do not mean never give up on a certain goal, instead I mean for me to never stop making the goals. I want to never quit striving to become a better version of myself. I can quit goals that aren’t benefitting me, quit the ones stressing me out to the point of depression, I must remember to move on from the ones bringing me down. I can make new goals over and over again until results are visible in my life as a whole. Failure in this scenario is as much a success as the actual successes. Failure blesses me with resilience and readies me for more setbacks. Only then am I able to see clear enough to notice my growth and really appreciate my successes. Life is a marathon, not a sprint -as they say. I must keep a steady breath, a focused mind, and a strong heart. The finish line -there in God’s arms- will bring me all the glory I have ever dreamed of.

I, I, I… – I tend to hate writing in this form of first person. I feel as though I am preaching from a soapbox. In this case it could never be less true. I am writing this today, after weeks of self-sabotage and now I am ready to come back to the light. I am ready to start over again. I am ready to focus my mind on the little improvements needed in my life. I am strengthening my heart against the “evil” -bad- cravings I have been wallowing in. I have come up for air and it is sweet. I no longer want to engage in self-pity or eat my feelings. I want to pass on that glass of wine. I want to take that walk. Sometimes it takes falling in order to find the courage it requires to climb to higher elevations.

My husband told me last night, “Shyra, you are a badass -start acting like it.”

Never have I received such motivating words. I want to be a warrior. Now, I must act like one.

-with luv