My son and I were driving the 20 miles home into the sunset. He turns to me with the light caressing his freckled face and says “Mom, I am scared to die.” …Whoa, heavy hitter!
I remember laying in bed as a freckled face girl stressing over the same topic. In my dismay, a simple answer came to me. “Eli, you are scared to die because you are not ready. God gave us stages in life to help us grow.” I don’t take responsibility for this insight, I think God helped me see it at a time I really needed to.
The logic being: a three year old touches everything in order to get a “feel” for the world. A four-five year old tests all the limits to learn his/hers. A preteen explores their wants and needs in order to learn which is more important. A teen examines love and their bodies, and boundaries of all sorts so they can graduate into adults. Young adults bear children in the vitality of life to help them as young parents chase after their energetic offspring. Late twenties learn who they really are and what they really want from life. In the thirties they see what is really important in life. Mid-aged know who they are and what is important and really start enjoying the little moments. Later on in age, the pain worsens, the body begins to quit, the mind is full of a lifetime of memories and they start to fade. Their now mid-aged children have children and maybe their children have children. A spouse may leave the other behind. They try to enjoy every moment, but eventually they began to see that when their time comes maybe they aren’t so scared after-all.
God leads us to this point. He walks with us through every stage of life and then at the end he is ready and you will be ready to reunite for eternity.
This logic is only logical for those who are blessed enough to live a full life. Of course at this point I refuse to believe anything but Eli having a full life.
God blessed us with a beautiful ride home. A fiery sunset and a deep, heart-nourishing conversation.